I bought killer boots yesterday. I know, this isn’t news, as you all devote hours of your time to my tweets and check back religiously at night to see if I’ve posted yet. I apologize for the repetition.
But the boots, they’re hottt. Despite my impressive vocabulary, there’s really not a better word for them. I mean, “fun,” “attractive,” “sweeeeet,” “gorgeous,” “funky,” “spectacular” and “sick find, dude!” are pretty good, but they don’t really capture the badassery of the boots the way “hottt” does.
I mean, c’mon. The extra Ts totally evoke that Harley-riding-yet-sexy-perfume-smelling, short-skirt-wearing, perfect-tousled-hair-coiffed, lightly-tanned-skin-with-bright-white-teeth-having badass chick. Obviously.
Of course, the fact that they’re vintage and that I got them for an embarrassingly low number of cash monies make them all the better. We’re just ignoring the fact that the stretchy-calf parts having dying elastic and that they’re horrendously filthy on the inside. Those are minor details.
Moving right along.
My latest footwear acquisition, however, boasts even more than hotttness, cheapness and retro cred:
“These boots were made for crushing your enemies, seeing them driven before you and hearing the lamentations of their bad grammar. And not for walking.” – Dr. Sally (and Conan the Barbarian), September 21, 2010
It should surprise no one that Dr. Sally is, again, right.
Indeed, these boots were made for peering out over the sun-beaten savanna and hunting African game.
These here boots were made for going 2.7 seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu.
These triumphant boots were made to scale the majestic peaks of the Himalayas, to stand tall and proud at the summit of Mt. Kilimanjaro.
Said boots were made for altered states of consciousness with early ‘90s rockstars before and until their untimely deaths by overdose.
The boots in question were made for the wrangling of unexpected reptiles or defending one’s self against the canine undead.
In truth, these boots were made for the utmost glamour, painting the town red, as they did with veritable Hollywood royalty.
These boots were made for heroic acts, standing up, marching, in the face of adversity.
But in truth, in sum, in full: These boots were made for blogging.
all the props & kudos i can muster go to Peachy for her amazing late-night save with the photo editing. love you! go visit her, y’all!