Category Archives: I thought this was supposed to be easy?

I thought this was supposed to be easy?, The Great Autumn Headache of 2010

‘gone.’

between december 28th and january 3rd, i had 5 migraines in 6 days. i measure it differently, depending on my mood:

9 imitrex in 144 hours.

8 meals taken, 10 missed.

6 wet towels from 6 wet icepacks, who each dripped their condensation down the thin curls on the back of my neck.

unending orange gatorade, my favorite perk.

a new year’s without champagne or cheering — and blessedly snooki-free.

i called kooky doctor, got an appointment for the next day and received a new med — a beta blocker — as well as more anti-depressants in hopes that regulating the size of the blood vessels in my head LA LA SCIENCE SCIENCE would kill the headaches.

january 9th i woke up without a headache.

and then i had one — but just one! — surely that’s manageable, yes?

and another yesterday. and another today.

maybe i’ll never learn not to hope so much, maybe i’ll always be surprised when things don’t work out right.

for now i’m hiding in my bed with my gatorade. please send cheese.

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good life choices, I thought this was supposed to be easy?, The Great Autumn Headache of 2010

in which i give up using capital letters, giving a shit or writing posts.

happy new year, y’all. excuse the brief hiatus. 4 migraines, 5 days — and someone forgot to take her meds, spending the first day of what WILL BE THE BEST YEAR EVER DAMN IT pukey and hungover — without imbibing a damn thing.

but just like the bloggess‘s commitment to be furiously happy, this year’s motto is militant:

jubilant, or gtfo.

you’re welcome.

jubilant, motherfuckers.

jubilant, motherfuckers.


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good life choices, I thought this was supposed to be easy?, if you can't stand the heat, make a little bird house in your soul

In which I try on a few identities for the spirit of Christmas.

as a yankee (in the American sense), for Christmas Eve dinner, I made fresh pizza. as a member of a snobby generation, the pizza included (but was not limited to) sauteed shallots, stinky cheese and pesto made and frozen this past summer from basil from the garden.

as a Southerner, I served fresh sausage gravy over hot butter biscuits with Jimmy Dean’s Hot Sausage — my fave — whipped eggs and fried up a little leftover ham for brunch today.

as a good Jewy McJewerstein, today for Christmas dinner I made crab rangoon with sweet & sour sauce, pork dumplings with ponzu and scallion pancakes.

as a pathetic excuse for a shell of a headachy person, I didn’t get to the mi fun before my back and feet mutinied, so we’ll just pretend that never happened.

as an invalid, I may now sleep for the next six weeks, after all that standing and cooking, bruised coccyx and all.

as a 12-year-old boy at heart, that word will never not be funny.

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hey world. here i am., I thought this was supposed to be easy?, what sweet madness

In which I cover my eyes, take more medication and hunt down my earplugs.

so. i’m sick. not exactly news. but it means i’m now at least 12 years behind on everything and hiding in my bed with new migraine meds.

still.

this is an official apology, announcement and reminder that my birthday’s tomorrow and you all need to love me profusely. screaming from the rooftops will not go unnoticed.

Xs and Os.

-m

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